Help! I'm a Green Chair and I Need New Roommates!
So, I'm a light green chair and I have a stain on one side and a couple of other marks. There. I said it. I'm not perfect. I'm not afraid to admit I've been around the block. I don't think that's any reason for my roommates want to get rid of me. But I overheard them talking about how I don't match the new couch, so I'm getting out of here before they put me on the street.
It's not fair. I've been living here for years. Yeah, I'm a little worn, but I don't have any fabric tears. No one has ever, like, thrown up on me. I don't smell. And I don't smoke. So I put this ad on Craigslist.
Wanna live with me? I'm cool just sitting around watching TV, if that's your thing, but I like to party, too. I'm looking for new roommates who are low maintenance. I'd be cool really anywhere. And I'm cheap. Not like slutty cheap, but I'll be yours for 25 bucks, or your best offer. You just need to bring cash. I live on the first floor, so moving out will be a snap. I bet I'd even fit in the back of a minivan cab. Then boom, we'll be roommates.
Do me a solid and buy me.
This is another Craiglist ad I posted. I guess I like personifying furniture.